This week, I hit Pioneer's annual Hophead Festival. Yankee Brew News was there so chances are you can get the lowdown on everything in journalistically integrity-filled manner. So I have decided to share my actual tasting notes to cover other territory.
Pioneer-Something Westerny Sounding California Double IPA
Not sure about this one. My understanding of things is California IPAs= hop bombs. This one is more on the malty side than expected. Masks ABV nicely. Speaking of ABV, this is the fourth time Todd has bought me one of his strongest beers then started talking about blowjobs. Invest in chastity belt. Not bad brew though. Just felt the name misleads a bit. Maybe I'm a clueless douche though. Research before posting.
Willamantic Nightcrawler Black IPA
Nice. Not always on board with the whole contradictory beer styles thing. It's a pitch black pale ale? ENIGLISH MAJOR SMASH! Well after I finish enjoying beautiful balance between hops and malt. Also nice reference to Judas Priest. Fuck that dude if it isn't. Listen to that riff ASAP.
Willamantic Prohibition
Dude apparently got old school hops and old school malts and did some beer LARPing. Wonder if he used a still, wore a fedora, and hired a man from the Midwest who ruined himself with the sauce. Be sure to not include that reference as that's one Lovecraft turd no one needs to read. Also research LARP opportunities. Got to be someone in my circle who plays Quidditch. Figure that one would pretty much require a combo of desired increase in activity and heavy drinking. Maybe there's LARP Jedi stuff? Sit and stare at objects trying to move them with your mind while breathing heavily? Note: if there is, make sure practice is nowhere near an elementary school. Tasty beer. Balanced. Remember to check duct tape on bumper cover before driving.
Dogfish Head 90 Min.
Okay. My palate must be shot. This tastes like gym socks. That guy is looking at me funny. Either he is trying to sneak glances at my shirt or I took a dump on his car last time. Okay. He just likes my shirt. Good. Pretty sure all vehicular dumping at brewery was confined to the Airstream.
Apocalypse IPA
Nice. I think. Seem to be stumbly. And flat out ignoring people then talking to their dogs. Summon the Designated Driver! SHIT! Forgot level 5 ring of summoning! This will be interest test of autocorrect. Words right = that. Words wrong = me. Holy fuck. So glad no rush to go home. Think Thunder... Thunder... Thundercats HOOOOO
Pioneer Into the Woods
This Into the Woods is much lamer than Sondheim's. Sure I can't taste it and just want to tell Tood I've had all three of his babies (note: do not say this to his wife as if Todd has told her half of what be tells everyone else she will take wrong way. Haul off. hit. Demand diviroce. Detonate Death Star pew pew pew FINISH TRILOGY WHILE STILL DRUNK! EASY IGNORE OF BAD SFX ADDITIONS! did I open parenthesizes back there? Close damn you cloooooooose. Galveston! Galvatron! Fuck you autocorrect. Never make me misspell a decepticon. I will fucking end you. YOU GOT THE TOUCH YOU GOT THE POWA! lopz dongs
Wormtown-Be ahoppy
So true to it's name I can taste the summabitch. Now I want to watch Smoneky and the bandit. Fuck yeah. She ways I need action flicks to man me up. Hahaha that fool! Showtubes will conquer her and bring her to the dark side
New England Brewing Imperial Stout Trooper
okay. Ate a meal. Drank six pints of water. Let's see if palate cleansing is adequate. Hot damn. Nice. Go to New Haven. Do not get drunk or fandom of this brewery will make you come across such that they throw Todd level of innuendo at you. Look into mace and chastity belt. Magically delicious balance. Not big on stouts these days but I'd do this.
Pretty Things X 1945
Bit sweet for me but second best LARP of the night. Srsly who the hell goes to Armsby Abbey the. Demands Bid Lite? Answer wrong question STAT! must not get sucked into mullet guy looking around at all the ladies chat noooooooo.
White Birch-Hop Session
Holy shot bill needs freshness dates! This stuff I know his beer downtown always sell as beer advocates are Anita but no way should this still have been on the shelf. Fizzy soap! Fuck!
Founders Double Trouble
Expected overhopped alcohol but honestly it was sort of beautiful. Do not go on twitter and link then to girl you know it's true video saying you feel this way about their beer. Freaking awesome.
Slumbrew flagraiser IPA
Not bad. I mean my palate is shot but I can pick up both hops and maybe malts which bodes well. Rebut. Retry. Fuck srsly this is my third round. Shot.
Blatant IPA
No nillshit just good beer well made with good ingredients. Nice in this era of quad double pink extra pale bitch sauce red ale horseshit.
Backlash Declaration
The kegs of this were pretty I wanted to love them spicy yet hoppy bookings. Haha autocorrect rocks LET'S GO VOLTRON FORCE wheee can't believe that kid is piloting black lion. Bullshit. Lance should ... Well not lance him. That would be illegal. Maybe magma pistols? In the face? In the faaaaaaaaaaaace. Wow. Ny face it is missing. Bedtime might need stepping stool though. Hope no pug poo! Woah me luck Internet not that o will be dumb enough to post this hahahaha
- Posted using The o Hammer
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